11.17.23 - Phantom Thread, Tully | Gems From the Rabbithole #2
Let's give the Netflix cult docu-series a rest...
I’m hoping these movie write-ups help suggest something interesting to watch on your weekend; a movie you maybe would not have chosen yourself. That’s my goal. Ain’t nothing more annoying than scrolling through Netflix’s bag o’ mess and landing on the same tired cult documentary series. I’m writing these essays spoiler-free to hopefully give you the general gist and some things to ponder pre- and post-movie night. Report back if ever you give one of these recs a try!
Phantom Thread (2017 | Netflix)
Daniel Day Lewis first appears on screen shaving his chin and plucking his nose hairs. I giddily shout at Nate “I’m so excited! He’s bout to fuck this shit up!” Daniel Day Lewis is in fact the greatest actor alive. A known method actor, his craft is to embody his character. He’s not acting, he just is. And in every film, from the very second he’s on screen, you’re immediately swept up in his character, in his story, in the world in which he lives. Until the credits roll, you belong to Daniel.
I hadn’t watched Daniel Day Lewis in anything new in a hot minute. I’ve basically had There Will Be Blood on loop for the longest. Phantom Thread has been on my list since it came out in 2017 and instead of watching it, I was busy watching Coming to America for the 178th time. Le sigh. I also do a weird thing sometimes — sometimes I’ll actively avoid watching a movie or a show that I already know in the depths of my clairvoyant soul I’m going to fall madly in love with — a love that’ll give me a Fatal Attraction level of obsession and corrupt my life for at least a week after viewing. I most recently did this with the series Daisy Jones and the Six, I’m still currently doing this with the 2015 documentary Amy.
Anyways!
Phantom Thread is a stunning film about a dark, toxic relationship that’s wrapped up in the most gorgeous couture designer bow. Director Paul Thomas Anderson introduces us to a world I found fascinating: it’s 1954 and we’re in London at the House of Woodcock, a haute couture fashion house led by genius Reynolds Woodcock. Reynolds’s sister Cyril is his right-hand woman and guard dog, keeping distractions at bay and running a tight ship of tireless couture seamstresses. Reynolds sketches dresses during his morning coffee and does fittings with socialites and literal princesses after midday tea. It’s post-war and the wealthy care about looking beautiful in beautiful clothes. Trivial but also of the upmost importance and while watching, you quickly forget we want to eat the rich and rather find yourself wanting to play dress-up with them.
Reynolds is a genius. And like all geniuses, he’s obsessive, uncompromising, and overly particular. Paul Thomas Anderson is a master at character-study films; he writes deeply human and complex characters whose idiosyncrasies remind you we’re all weirdos. From the way Reynolds likes his asparagus cooked to the silence he demands at breakfast, his narcissism forces everyone to submit and his ingenuity forgives him of accountability. That is, until Alma arrives.
To act opposite Daniel Day Lewis is an Olympic feat and Vicky Krieps was a remarkable opponent. She held her own opposite one of the greatest, the very same way Alma held her own against Reynolds. She’s first introduced as his new muse — a concept at first flattering. To be the inspiring force behind a creative genius’s works? What an honor. Soon though, we feel for Alma as she fights for recognition, for Reynolds to simply pick his head up from his sketchbook and see her and, by extension, see us — his eye contact avoiding the camera the same way he ignores her. She is so confidant in her love for him although it feels she shouldn’t be; she’s following a long line of women before her who’ve been disregarded.
What happens when you fall in love with a genius? Or just a powerful man? They say “behind every great man is a great woman rolling her eyes.” We find this out through Alma’s eyes. The negotiations you have to make. Your struggle to decipher what’s a sacrifice and what’s a compromise. Figuring out where do you bend and where do you stand up for yourself. All relationships are negotiations to an extent, with even the most modern, feminist women still making the most concessions. Control and who owns it is at the core of Reynolds and Alma’s relationship. Their story explores the thin line between the struggle to release control and the sudden willingness to release it when the right person forces you into submission; somewhere in the middle, toxicity and passion is blurred. While we know the healthiest relationships have a balance of power, Reynolds and Alma discover and create this balance in a shockingly unexpected way that’ll have you, the viewer, mouth agape.
Do most geniuses have complex relationships with their mothers? Because Reynolds is no different. The movie is much about loss and the unusual ways we grieve and make sense of our pain. The signs we make up and the superstitions we create to help us make decisions and cope with life without a loved one. There is an iconic scene Nate and I rewatched and discussed twice featuring Reynolds coming to peace with his mother. It’s a deeply vulnerable and revealing moment for Reynolds in a scene built with virtually no dialogue and so much subtext communicated mostly through Anderson’s creative decisions. If you ever wonder WTF a film director does, this scene demonstrates how decisions like where each character is positioned in the room, where the camera directs your attention, and the tension and emotion created as a result can work together to masterfully force tears to roll down your cheeks while watching.
Lastly, let’s talk about this music. I LOVE this film’s score. Written and composed by Jonny Greenwood of the band Radiohead, the music is its own character. It’s as rich and as elegant as the world on screen. Each song massages your heart and feels like love: whimsical, intoxicating, spellbinding, full of magic, full of dread, full of longing. The music is as haunting as it is enchanting, but most of all it fits the movie like a glove.
Final Verdict: If you want to watch some first-class acting, be deeply moved, or just watch something visually beautiful, Phantom Thread is it. It’s also apparently Daniel Day Lewis’s last film, which I can’t even... Also, if the world of haute couture interests you, I recommend the Netflix docu-series 7 Days Out — episode 5 on Chanel’s Haute Couture Fashion Show. If a story about the woman behind a genius interests you, I also recommend the 2018 Glenn Close film The Wife.
Tully (2018 | Netflix)
I usually think twice before putting on a movie about childbirth or motherhood. As I’m nearing that time of my life, I’m trying to enjoy willful ignorance just a lil bit longer.
I forgot all about Charlize Theron if I’m honest. But Tully quickly reminded me, she’s that bitch. And kinda has been probably since The Devil’s Advocate. “Ugly” Charlize Theron is a treat and kinda when she does her best work. In Tully, she had me cracking up, screaming at the screen, and crying for her. I also forgot all about filmmaker Diablo Cody — lest we forget Juno and one of my long-forgotten favorite shows ever The United States of Tara. There’s nothing better than watching a woman lead written by a woman.
In Tully, Charlize plays Marlo, a married and pregnant mom with two young kids, one of whom has an undiagnosed behavioral disorder. To say she’s overwhelmed is an understatement. She hasn’t slept in what feels like months, she and her husband haven’t had sex in God knows how long, and after the birth of her third child — she becomes a baby-feeding zombie. She makes being a mom look like indeed the hardest job on the planet and the drowning and loss of self is too real. Watching her, I wondered why anyone would ever want three kids. Mind you, I’m the youngest of three…. The end of silence, the constant movement, and the pure servitude while also kinda being broke all the time?! But being a mom is the greatest job in the world, they say…
Who’s they again?
Marlo finally decides to give in to hiring a night nurse so she can literally get some sleep and here enters Tully, a young, free-spirited, almost mystical baby whisperer sent to take care of the baby and, by extension, Marlo. She also bakes cupcakes and Marlo wakes up each morning to a clean house. Oh, the privilege of having help. The movie asks: “How do single moms do it?” Tully and Marlo form a special bond that of course becomes a bit complicated. Tully helps Marlo remember her old self, while Marlo warns Tully of the impending dooms of motherhood and aging.
The constant reminding Marlo that her life is beautiful and exactly what she chose almost felt like gaslighting. The movie really reminds us how babies change everything and to tread carefully. The impacts on your body, your mental health, your marriage, your friendships, your other children, your self-identity. The drowning, particularly if you don’t have help. My best friend is a mother of three, struggling to keep her head above water. The movie reminds you to check-in on your friends with kids. It also reminded me to start with one kid and see how it goes.
Postpartum depression is very apparent in the movie but not really spoken aloud — the biggest critique I’ve found of the film. Marlo’s exhausted delusion and straight up survival mode strangely brings alot of comedic relief. You have tremendous empathy for her, as you watch her sincerely trying her best, but her mental state is clearly a bit out of whack which actually makes you wonder about the health of the kids. I have a palpable fear of postpartum depression — this boogeyman you may or may not find under your bed. Being frank, I have alot of fears of pregnancy, childbirth, and motherhood that this movie stirred right up; but the central question I landed on: how many sacrifices am I willing to make in order to create life on Earth? Another day, another essay…
Final Verdict: Watch if you’re a new parent seeking understanding and commiseration or if you’re an aspiring mother in the mood for a horror movie minus the jump scares; this movie will give you much to ponder before the inevitable leap.
Where does Phantom Thread rank in Daniel Day Lewis movies for you? Did Tully terrify you like it did me? Let me know in the comments!
Progress Update: November Monthly Midnight Watch - Daisy Jones and the Six!
So I’ve breezed through my rewatch of Daisy Jones and the Six and I’m already in withdrawal. At every chance, Nate is humming a song from the show. He’s clearly in withdrawal too.
I kinda wanna be Daisy Jones when I grow up. Minus the drug addiction, recklessness, selfishness, and childhood trauma of course. I just love her — her style, her voice, her messiness, her unabashed commitment to living life on her terms, her flaws and all.
I’m excited to sit with one of my dear friends Sarah (who read the book!) to record a special podcast episode breaking down every element of the series. Watch Daisy Jones and the Six (Amazon Prime) by November 30 and join me in The Nite Owl subscriber chat (it’s like a group text with me and other Nite Owl readers) that weekend where we’ll kick off our discussion.
To join our chat, you’ll need to download the Substack app, now available for both iOS and Android. Chats are sent via the app, not email, so turn on push notifications so you don’t miss conversations as they happen!
So I’m definitely watching Escaping Twin Flames as I write this. I’m all talk, I can’t resist a cult documentary. These white people are craaaaazyyyyy, but also they have two black people in this doc?! I can’t. Here are some gems from my recent late night Internet deep dives…
READ: “Growing up in a funeral home” by Nate Scott-Reichel - My husband Nate is super passionate about self-development. He’s one of the most balanced, optimistic, and reflective people I know; I’m pretty sure growing up in a funeral home and being the son and grandson of funeral directors has something to do with it. He just launched his coaching and consultancy project called InStrive, with a desire to help folks maximize their human potential and eliminate regret. While he doesn’t consider himself a writer, he did write a beautiful piece sharing insights from his unique bringing. Proud wife here!
LISTEN: “Mortal” by Baby Rose - I don’t remember how I initially came across this song. I’ll give credit to my husband Nate, as it brings back memories of our early days of dating. For some reason this song came back to me this week and I’ve been listening to it periodically. Honestly, I haven’t listened much more to Baby Rose’s music. This song is a strange one-off in my repertoire. Her voice is full of soul and feels super cozy.
LAUGH: When is my back not hurting?
WATCH: DIRT | Adventure Local YouTube Series - Nate and I ate up this lil YouTube travel and food web-series. The host Josh is a cool dad — he’s tatted, likes jumping off cliffs, is a washed-up pro-snowboarded turned videographer. He starts off every episode meeting with a local chef/restaurateur before venturing off “beyond the city limits to source food and ingredients unique to the region.” You learn alot about local food sourcing, see some beautiful landscapes, and drool over the epic feast the chef cooks up in the end using all the ingredients Josh found along his travels. Start with the New Orleans episode.
EAT: Devil’s Food Cake from Claud - This might be the best slice of chocolate cake in NYC and the best I’ve ever tasted. Yes, it was $22. BUT, the slice is gigantic and Nate and I savored it slowly over the course of 3 days. It’s super moist, has the perfect cake to frosting ratio, and has speckles of sea salt which…*chefs kiss* Other honorable mentions from Claud, a cozy wine bar in East Village serving European-style (however vague that is) food: chicken liver agnolotti, squash fritters with pecorino, grilled cabbage with sunflower seeds and dill, blackened swordfish with eggplant, coconut ice cream.
Thanks for reading! Let me know what you think, what you want me to write about, what you want me to watch. Or just drop me a line and say hey!
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kudos on another engaging newsletter. i’m
jet lagged and reading this at 3am was so effortless.